If I Ran the Zoo—traditionalist version

The National Association of Scholars website ran a contest among its contributors on the theme, “How would YOU run the higher ed zoo?”, with the submissions to be based on the verse type of Dr. Seuss’s book, If I Ran the Zoo.

Here is Carol Iannone’s submission:

2009 If I Ran the Zoo #3:
Sleeping Quarters

If I were the one that was running the zoo,
I would follow th’example of Gerald McGrew.
I too would resist the awf’lly old fashioned,
In favor of quelque chose new.
Something to shock and to make people see
How odd is the notion of two different sexes,
But how joyous a thing it could be.
Girls sleep in one dorm and boys in another,
Imagine the novelty!
And reduction in problems and anger and vengeance
And increase in dignity!
Let the outdated fem’nists and gray libertarians
Cling to the old and outworn.
Bring on the curfews and visiting hours,
And herald the new lovely morn!

Posted by Lawrence Auster at June 05, 2009 12:21 PM | Send