The reality of “dating” today

A male reader writes:

You are correct in your definition of “dating.” I am impressed by your ability to discern accurately the meaning of such language and the related phenomena from afar, when most people your age, especially supposed conservatives, are willfully ignorant.

For the modern woman, sex is nearly always a prerequisite for “dating” status. And even then, the occurrence of sex does not mean she considers herself to be “dating” the man. If they had gone on a few “dates,” but were not “dating” in her mind, and he mistakenly referred to them in passing as “dating,” she would be taken aback, so important is her independence; she may even think the man’s verbal slip shows him to be needy and desperate. And among younger women (roughly 24 and under), even a “date” puts them on edge, with its intimation of a loss of independence down the line. They prefer “hanging out,” often in large mixed groups where building intimacy and an individual, personal connection is nigh impossible. It is often the case that sex occurs instead after a night of drunken revelry.

Inevitably, women are wont to end such relationships at a moment’s notice. The more cynical men cope with such sexual frustration by courting multiple women and refraining from forming any attachment, which in turn makes them more attractive to the women.

Posted by Lawrence Auster at June 17, 2012 01:51 PM | Send